June 10th, 2006, in front of an intimate crowd of followers, William Stunt
Rock retired from performing. Stunt Rock will continue making music and
working on various projects, but does not wish to continue with live shows.
As for reasons for the retirement, at commencement of the final live set
a list was handed out that featured the fifty reasons for the retirement.
They were recorded as follows:
01. I am
tired of having to kiss peoples asses in order to get them to come to
02. I am tired of having to remind these same people to come to my shows
over and over.
03. I don’t want these people there, nor do they even want to be
there. Said guests and I are just doing things out of
guilt for each other, which is not healthy.
04. I am tired of having to get really drunk on stage and sleep over at
someone else’s house near the venue,
when all I really want to do is go home.
05. I am very annoyed with getting paid less than $7 an hour to perform
(When you factor in prep time, load in, sound check, etc.)
06. Lack of free beer and oral sex after performing.
07. Lack of interest in performing in general.
08. Lack of interest in hobbies and other endeavors where I am not guaranteed
a certain per hour income.
09. The fact that I would actually pay myself more NOT to have to play
shows. For example, on average, I would pay myself $300 to stay home,
get up early, mow the lawn, and clean the house as opposed to stand on
stage until 2am getting drunk in front of strangers.
10. No one takes my stand up comedy routine serious, resulting in constant
shouting over my jokes and routines.
This is very disheartening and has resulted in a decline in on stage humor.
11. All my fans in Wisconsin are meth heads.
12. All my fans in Illinois are grown men stuck in a perpetual state of
frat boy jocularity.
13. In 8 years I have yet to meet a fellow performer who shares my own
opinions and views of the world.
As a result, a feeling of isolation is perpetual.
14. The one time after 8 years that I finally went home with a chick was
extremely disappointing and led to a
significant moment of clarity, perhaps for the first time in my adult
15. No one appreciates my attempts at melding with hip hop culture and
instead wishes to force me into the long dead hardcore rave scene.
16. Stupid music labels like “Indie Hop” and “Breakcore”
and “Experimental Hip Hop” and “Mash Up.”
17. People who review my albums without knowing my complete discography.
18. Is my loss of hearing really worth your enjoyment?
19. Concern about my prostate.
20. The fact that after 8 years, I still have to be fall down drunk in
order to stand up in front of a group of strangers and play.
21. Lack of interest in general from people who claim to be “big
22. I am tired of having to explain to my ex girlfriend why I don’t
want her to come to my shows.
23. Standing in poorly ventilated clubs filled with smoke doesn’t
seem like a very healthy thing to do.
24. In a way I feel like I am selfishly forcing my real friends to drive
approx. 45 to stand around, get drunk, and then be forced to drive home
and get potential D.U.I.’s.
25. Making music comes to easy these days and seems a bit to formulaic
even for my simple methods.
26. All fans with girlfriends serve as a constant reminder of what I should
really be doing with my life; meeting a life partner.
27. My fanbase grows at the approximate rate of 2 males per 8 shows played,
and 1 female per 34 shows played. (Actual statistics).
28. The majority of my fanbase would rather buy me a beer than buy my
new CD or T-Shirt.
29. Venues without a backstage area.
30. Friends and fans that want to be guest listed.
31. Having to listen to people’s shitty excuses about why they didn’t
make it to a show. (Most common excuses in order: Girlfriend was Being
a Bitch, No Ride, No Oxycotin, Forgot Venue Information, Met Hot Chick
, No Money, Can’t Find I.D., Overslept).
32. The majority of women I am finding interested in me because of my
music are either: a. Divorced or b. between the ages of 17-19.
33. Simply put, why am I trying to become what I don’t want to be?
34. I only smoke cigarettes in the weeks leading up to, and during, a
35. My car is getting old and I am tired of driving it all over Wisconsin,
Illinois, Minnesota, and Indiana.
36. Touring Europe free of charge for 3 weeks at a time is extremely overrated
when all you care about is staying home.
39. No girls in Europe want to get to know traveling American musicians
with self esteem issues.
40. Fellow musicians constantly mock me and downplay me into “token
funny opening act” slots which I have outgrown.
41. I’m almost at the age where all of my heroes died. Isn’t
that a clue to hang it up?
42. My father does not understand or sees no artistic merit in what I
43. Lack of merchandise sales over all.
44. My last two albums have been a mockery of my mid period “good”
albums which where created while I lived in my moms basement as a 25 year
old man. Since moving out, subsequent albums have just been riffing on
the same material with sub par results.
45. Wrist pain.
46. According to studies, I would drink less if I stopped playing music.
47. Pressure from my Mother to “grow the fuck up and stop goofing
around with these computers and friends.”
48. Catching colds at shows is a common occurrence.
49. The guy doing the documentary on me is starting to get a little “weird.”
50. Lack of response to everything on this list.
“This is Stunt Rock Vol. 3”
Released: October 2005
third song on "This Is Stunt Rock Vol. 3" (mp3!)
you dig deep enough in some underground videotape trading circles you
can find a tape from back in 1999 of Billy Stunt Rock performing
in a band called "Meat." He can be seen slashing himself with
razorblades, urinating in cups and drinking them, smashing computer monitors
on his head, all while a band plays mediocre Black Sabbath covers and
Dan Doormouse shoves meat up his ass. Perhaps the tape was just a product
of Midwest boredom and youthful ambition, but whatever the case, let us
introduce you to the confusing and zany world of Stunt Rock, the most
legendary, reclusive, and talked about artist to rise from the ashes of
the Midwest-USA Breakcore scene.
Rock built his career on countless spray-painted CDR's given away at shows
in a drunken stupor. A total disregard for sequencing and obsession with
samples gave way to a reputation as the new "punk rock" of the
electronic scene in the Midwest.
the emptiness of existence, while at the same time mocking it, “This
is Stunt Rock Vol. 3” is the most genuine assertion of the modern
lifestyle ever committed to disc. Built on loop after loop of drum, guitar
and movie dialogue, the album becomes a sort of looser’s Music Concrete.
But is it actually funny? Fuck yeah! Rolling Stone says: “This is
Stunt Rock Vol. 3’ is like a new sort of rock n roll comedy meltdown;
irreverent, blue collar, foul mouthed, and beer fueled. “This is
Stunt Rock Vol. 3” will be an instant classic!”
his track on the Free Mp3 comp!